Our Last Weekday Nap

I wrote this poem while laying in bed, snuggling with my four month old while he was napping. My heart was heavy. I was going to go back to work the following week, and he was going to start at daycare full time.

He is my second child, but it was not easier sending him to daycare. In fact, it was much harder. I think it’s because I knew exactly what to expect. Before I sent my older son to daycare, I had some apprehension just like any new mom, but I could tell myself I was being paranoid, that I worried too much. Things could be a lot better than I had imagined. The teachers could be so gentle, so caring and so thorough beyond my imagination.

Now I know EXACTLY what to expect. I know the daycare is not horrible and that he will survive just fine, but I also know that teachers come and go, they don’t always follow my instructions and they don’t all know the babies very well. I know he will probably be sick once or twice a month. I know I will not be pleasantly surprised. That is why it’s so hard. I know too much to expect.

That, and he is probably our last kid. And there is nothing quite like napping with a snugly little baby in a quiet house.

So with tears in my eyes, I recorded what I was seeing and feeling at that time on my iPad: 

Give you a kiss on your damp forehead
Give you a kiss on your chubby arms
Give you a kiss on your little hands
Give you a kiss on your round cheeks
Give you a kiss on your pouty baby lips

For this is the last time
we nap together
during a weekday lazy afternoon
just the two of us

For this is the last time
I wake up drowsy
from oversleeping
regretting the hours lost
in unconsciousness
in unproductivity
during a weekday lazy afternoon
just the two of us

For this is the last time
I wake up happy
listening to your quick heavy breathing
staring through your crazy hair at your little nose tip
feeling your warm sweaty body right next to mine
enjoying the stillness, quietness and happiness
during a weekday lazy afternoon
just the two of us

For I’m going back to work next week

Kiss our last weekday nap goodbye
I’ll lay here
be still
be quiet
be unproductive
just staring at you
through your crazy hair obstructing my view
savoring this moment before you wake

3 Responses to Our Last Weekday Nap

  1. Beautifully written, brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing!

  2. Awww <3 Love!!!!

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